Stupid People Love Oak Bluffs

Oak Bluffs has an under tow; the late night bar scene, the prospect of meeting another equally inebriated stranger and catching some disease are just two of the reasons why the town pulls down winners like these...

BABY FACED THIEVES: Two young women use babies to cover their crime. Just before 4pm on Saturday, police in Oak Bluffs were called to a store on Circuit Ave for a report of shoplifting. After what police describe as a "brief investigation" it is discovered that the two young woman had stolen several items from three separate stores. How did they do it? Easy, they placed the stolen merchandise under and around the twin infant children they were pushing in a stroller. Michelle Plesser, 22, from 375 Edgartown Rd will be issued a summons by mail out of concern for the children. Her au pair, 18-year-old Melissa Boyd was arrested and charged with Shoplifting. Nice job ladies.

DUDE WHERE'S MY HOUSE: Earlier on Saturday, much earlier, police responded to a call of an intruder. An "alarmed citizen" reported an intoxicated male inside his house. Arriving just after 3am, officers found a 19-year-old man highly intoxicated and confused about where exactly he was. How intoxicated was he? So drunk that he entered the wrong house. Some of you may feel sympathy for the young man - your friends lose you in the middle of the night, you are too drunk, you have never been here before and all the houses in Oaks Bluff look the same. Officers were sympathetic as well and placed the yoot into protective custody without filing charges. VT wonders if he missed his boat out of here the next morning...